TRAILER TRASH POOL PARTY (WHERE THERE IS NO 3 BEER MAXIMUM)
August 9th, Weather:hot and shitty with winds out of the north at 4 knots.
So there we were, a bunch of horny, and soon to be really drunk wankers, preparing for the inevitable debaucle that would be the " trailer trash hash". All I can say, is at least we didn't kill anybody. As the hounds began to arrive, word circulated that maggot and fucking crazy were still at The Triangle swilling back beer in true white trash fashion. With the secret of the beer stop well in the minds of the hares....we decided to start the hash anyway.... min. late....on time by my account. After much rejoicing for the return of our brother stuff the clam, the hares give a very organized and not hard to follow chalk talk and leave the circle in someones hands....I don't know who did what from here on out...so I'll just make up shit. The hares Piss Boy and Gaylord Focker are off with a 10 min. start. Live trail of course takes the hounds south and around safeco field a ways, to a cb69 (yes, that would be a check back 69) With the frb's finding this marker, the hounds backtrack to the on-start where slippery is waiting for them with the first beer stop....BOT, and her man LP, are not too hard to miss, as the camel toe from BOT seems to blind everyone, and the shouts from LP are not hard to miss. With the beer consumed, a dangerous and lengthy trek over to The Triangle pub is made for beer stop #2. Yes, I know, it's the start of a lot of drinking. As the hares are currently hauling ass down alaskan way, the hounds manage to polish off a few pitchers and then get a clue to pick up trail at the start of the underground tour, and then on to beer stop #3 at Las Margaritas. Where not 2, nor 3, but 4 pitchers were handed out. All I know is that the mexicans there were only too thrilled to watch as BOT walked around in those freaking cut off shorts. On to beer stop #4 at the 2 Dagos bar where beer having been purchased the hares moved on to the on in. Of course leave it to a bunch of drunken hounds to order a shitload more beer. This didn't deter the ladies from skipping the last beer stop and being the frb's and telling the hares that the miller hill guys are completely and utterly fucked up. Not more than 20 min. later, a horde of drunken hashers made it to the on in, with LP doing his best impression of Mary Lou Retton for us in the parking garage. After assembling the masses and managing to get everyone together, we moved into the theater room where soft porn was replaced by hard core XXX porn, only to have Assma yell out to go back to the soft porn. WHAT? Once the group was in we headed down to the 5th level of the parking garage for Religion.....a very organized and non-chaotic religion...HA!
Hares: Gaylord Focker, Pissboy
Drunker than shit: Little Prick; Miller Hill Guys
Visiting Hashers (FHKIT H3): Free 2 Lay, Dances with Mules, BigGulp
Virgen: Some guy from California that joined in at The Triangle, and CDP's virgen just _________. (hehe, all I can say is that I was too drunk to remember names)
Shouldn't have been naked in the hot tub: Twatnot.com (they're still cleaning the filters dammit)
DFL: BBM; Sex in the Hottub: Lady Muff Diver and KFC (just wrong)
Whining: Assma, Twatnot.com (but at least he got his freaking sushi, right)
Trailer trash look alikes: BOT and LP (prizes given to them at the mega hash campout)
Trying to steal exercise balls while naked: Little Prick
After religion and pissing in trash cans and the intelligable songs, and an organized religion, we are up to the hot tub, where clothes were soon lost, only to be replaced by the rampant manhandling of anuses and boobs. After watching Little Prick run on the treadmill naked at about 15 mph (you kill me dude) we found that the group got bored and started running around through the elevators at the apt. complex, much to the entertainment of the apt. security, who saw everything on their little security cameras. And when all was said and done, and we had sent home the few drunkards by cab, and one of the last shuttles to the cars was being conducted, all that could be heard was the sleepy voice of a harriet that we all know and love, asking..."who's fingers are in me anyway?" That there, summed everything up for the night. On On to megalo hash weekend.
If I forgot something, then send it out, I would like to hear what else happened on the actual trail, and On On to the next one. If you disagree with any of what I wrote, well.....I don't give a shit. HA!